Oldgas.com Home

Home | Help | Events | Classifieds | Bookstore | Pictures | Auctions | Links | Collectors | Parts | Contact

Page 3 of 11 < 1 2 3 4 5 10 11 >
Topic Options
#543985 - Mon Jun 23 2014 01:20 PM Re: Todays Funny [Re: Cold Pizza]
JUNK KING Offline
Veteran Member

Registered: Thu Feb 14 2013
Loc: Oklahoma
"Shovel ready project"
_________________________
Seeking Knowledge and a Good Deal.
Always looking for neon signs and skins , Flying A ,& Wayne 60s.

Top
#544165 - Tue Jun 24 2014 01:23 AM Re: Todays Funny [Re: Cold Pizza]
bruzer75 Offline
Veteran Member

Registered: Fri Sep 22 2006
Loc: Grants Pass, OR, USA
Those Sneaky squirrels! Haha
May our lives glorify God,
Michael

Top
#550615 - Thu Jul 03 2014 02:11 AM Re: Todays Funny [Re: bruzer75]
huskybob Online   content
Veteran Member

Registered: Fri Nov 16 2001
Loc: Near Tracy Rock
The only cow in a small town in Tennessee stopped giving milk. The people did some research and found they could buy a super milk cow up in Michigan, for $800.00.

They bought the cow from Michigan and the cow was wonderful. It produced lots of milk all of the time, and the people were pleased and very happy.

They decided to acquire a bull to mate with the cow and produce more cows like it. They would never have to worry about their milk supply again.

They bought a bull and put it in the pasture with their beloved cow. However, whenever the bull came close to the cow, the cow would move away. No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away from the bull and he could not succeed in his quest. The people were very upset and decided to ask the Vet, who was very wise, what to do. They told the Vet what was happening. "Whenever the bull approaches our cow, she moves away.If he approaches from the back, she moves forward. When he approaches her from the front, she backs off. An approach from the side and she walks away to the other side."

The Vet thinks about this for a minute and asked, "Did you buy this cow in Michigan ?" The people were dumbfounded, since they had never mentioned where they bought the cow. "You are truly a wise Vet," they said. "How did you know we got the cow in Michigan ?"

The Vet replied with a distant look in his eye,
"My wife is from Michigan ."

Top
#551500 - Mon Jul 07 2014 02:23 PM Re: Todays Funny [Re: huskybob]
Dave's Garage Offline
Veteran Member

Registered: Mon Dec 05 2011
Loc: Abbotsford, British Columbia, ...
A cowboy, who just moved to Wyoming from Texas, walks into a bar and orders three mugs of Bud. He sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.

The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy, "You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it. It would taste better if you bought one at a time."

The cowboy replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Arizona, the other is in Colorado. When we all left our home in Texas, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together. So I'm drinking one beer for each of my brothers and one for myself."

The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.

The cowboy becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way. He orders three mugs and drinks them in turn.

One day, he comes in and only orders two mugs. All the regulars take notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss."

The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns in his eyes and he laughs. "Oh, no, everybody's just fine," he explains, "It's just that my wife and I joined the Baptist Church and I had to quit drinking. Hasn't affected my brothers though."
_________________________
Dave GILL,
Dave's Garage & Memorabilia, Inc.

Top
#551545 - Mon Jul 07 2014 05:33 PM Re: Todays Funny [Re: Dave's Garage]
Oilcanman87 Offline
Veteran Member

Registered: Mon Aug 19 2013
Loc: Michigan
That's a good ole knee slapper there Dave.


Edited by Oilcanman87 (Mon Jul 07 2014 05:34 PM)
_________________________
Oilzum, 1qt Oil Cans, Gas and Oil smalls, Oldsmobile collectables.

Top
#551723 - Tue Jul 08 2014 04:28 PM Re: Todays Funny [Re: Oilcanman87]
oldnfuelish Offline
FATW Feature Host

Registered: Wed Nov 02 2005
Loc: Antioch,IL
_________________________
Looking for gas,oil related clocks,especially neon and spinners .clock repair available. Mick

Top
#551743 - Tue Jul 08 2014 06:07 PM Re: Todays Funny [Re: oldnfuelish]
JUNK KING Offline
Veteran Member

Registered: Thu Feb 14 2013
Loc: Oklahoma
That's god stuff Mick.
_________________________
Seeking Knowledge and a Good Deal.
Always looking for neon signs and skins , Flying A ,& Wayne 60s.

Top
#554202 - Fri Jul 18 2014 10:01 AM Re: Todays Funny [Re: JUNK KING]
Cold Pizza Online   content
Veteran Member

Registered: Tue May 17 2005
Loc: Illinois
.


Attachments
summertime.jpg



Top
#554324 - Sat Jul 19 2014 06:33 AM Re: Todays Funny [Re: Cold Pizza]
Gaspedler Offline
Petro Enthusiast

Registered: Sun Feb 04 2001
Loc: Lebanon, Indiana. USA
.


Attachments
Baiting Deer1.jpg



Top
#555296 - Tue Jul 22 2014 09:39 PM Re: Todays Funny [Re: Gaspedler]
hawkike Online   content
Veteran Member

Registered: Sat Dec 09 2006
Loc: citrus heights ca.95610
Sue Wong marries Lee Wong,a year later they have a baby,problem--the baby is white.The nurse says to Lee Wong "what will you name your baby?'.Lee Wong says--two Wongs do not make a white.I will name him ---

Sum Ting Wong!!

Top
#556042 - Fri Jul 25 2014 03:53 PM Re: Todays Funny [Re: hawkike]
Cold Pizza Online   content
Veteran Member

Registered: Tue May 17 2005
Loc: Illinois
.


Attachments
funny1.jpg



Top
#556048 - Fri Jul 25 2014 04:26 PM Re: Todays Funny [Re: Cold Pizza]
K W FRITH Offline
Veteran Member

Registered: Sun Oct 21 2007
Loc: Devils Lake, ND---USA
A few questions!

Q1..
In which battle did Napoleon die? *
his last battle

Q2..
Where was the Declaration of Independence
signed? *
at the bottom of the page

Q3..
River Ravi flows in which state? *
liquid

Q4..
What is the main reason for divorce? *
marriage

Q5..
What is the main reason for failure? *
exams

Q6..
What can you never eat for breakfast? *
Lunch & dinner

Q7..
What looks like half an apple? *
The other half

Q8..
If you throw a red stone into the blue sea
what it will become? *
Wet

Q9..
How can a man go eight dayswithout
sleeping ? *
No problem, he sleeps at night.

Q10.
How can you lift an elephant with
one hand? *
You will never find an elephant that
has one hand.

Q11.
If you had three apples and four oranges in one
hand and four apples and three oranges in other hand,
what would you have ? *
Very large hands

Q12.
If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how
long would it take four men to build it? *
No time at all, the wall is already built.

Q13.
How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor
without cracking it? *
Any way you want, concrete floors
are very hard to crack.

Spread some laughter, share the cheer Let's
be happy, while we're here !!
_________________________
Everything Cities Service
Specializing in old Gas Pumps
kwfrith@gondtc.com
Cell#-701-739-6133

Top
#556055 - Fri Jul 25 2014 05:32 PM Re: Todays Funny [Re: K W FRITH]
Dick Bennett Offline
Veteran Member

Registered: Wed Oct 25 2000
Loc: Santa Paula, Calif
OMG,
Kevin has been visiting the Rest Home or Pre-Schooler's, AGAIN!

Top
#556319 - Sun Jul 27 2014 02:22 AM Re: Todays Funny [Re: Dick Bennett]
Dave's Garage Offline
Veteran Member

Registered: Mon Dec 05 2011
Loc: Abbotsford, British Columbia, ...
"YOU NEVER SURPRISE ME" A woman complained one day to her long suffering husband.

Buy me a surprise for my birthday. Something that can accelerate from 0 to 150 in under 4 seconds, .. And I'd prefer a blue one!" she hinted.

Happy and excited she was counting down the days for her birthday.

And finally she got the beautiful present her husband had thoughtfully chosen for her ...

He's dead now ... But he died a legend!!!

Scroll down


Attachments
Scale1.jpg


_________________________
Dave GILL,
Dave's Garage & Memorabilia, Inc.

Top
#558079 - Mon Aug 04 2014 08:40 AM Re: Todays Funny [Re: Dave's Garage]
K W FRITH Offline
Veteran Member

Registered: Sun Oct 21 2007
Loc: Devils Lake, ND---USA
This morning I was beaten up by a woman.
I was in an elevator when this beautiful, busty woman got in.
I was staring at her boobs, when she said, "Would you please press 1?"

I don't remember much after that, I wish women would be more clear on
what they want!
_________________________
Everything Cities Service
Specializing in old Gas Pumps
kwfrith@gondtc.com
Cell#-701-739-6133

Top
Page 3 of 11 < 1 2 3 4 5 10 11 >

Moderator:  Oldgas, Ryan Underthun, Watchdog3 

Click on magnifying glass icon on lower left to search eBay

Copyright © 2017 Primarily Petroliana Interactive, All Rights Reserved