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4 Stories COMBINED, Re-wrote [some] & EDITED Again;
........A TRIP TO IOWA GAS.........
I'm Rarin to Go, RUST COLLECTORS PARADISE! Need to find some coololdstuff.

Talked to Gas Pump Rob about sharing a ride, says he won't have enough room on his trailer for me to buy anything, after he promised Matt ALVAREZ he'd haul 3 pumps for him but I was Welcome to ride & split expenses for the trip!

Thought about taking the st.rod but would be cramped & very limited on space. Thought about the DuceCpe, but trunk ain't big enough. Hemibird has a tank full of oldgas & lastgas I put in chevelle smelled like it was in sanford's Old Racer.

Was hoping work would have been steady enough to get a cherry new truck. My besgar 1st thought was a smaller pickup & after looking at imports that use olddutchgas, I've changed my mind. U.S.A. made gaspower pickups for me, BUT nochevys!

I'm oldnfuelish so I'll be driving the roadrelics old Dodge, it runs on puregas & it's a little cheaper than souperhigh grade.

So I better get it checked out at MetroPetro, he's on vacation so I take it to frankpl's shop, but he is way behind & recommends Esse's Garage, but he only works on Fords, so it's over to Dave's Garage for repair [new guy moved down from Canada just starting out & CAN use the work]. Office gal Jody takes the keys & hands them to Mr.Wadhams who drives it into 1st stall in shop.

Inspector66, starts by looking under hood, checks Baselt belt, Hubba hoses, checks the power lube stuff & adds a bit of Garage-A-GoGo brake fluid. JBrooks replaced 8 sparkpluggil's. dalin & mcguffeyd1 are his apprentices & reconnects the plug wires. Hey, after 45 minutes they FINALLY got them correct!

Then a gearhead crawls underthun to check there, drains oldoi & they refill w/ [5quarts of blacktee, okoil1 is full, he grabs a hammer. BOO BOOM ! Says the thermactor is fixed. I ask what's that ? "Oh don't worry, it won't be a problem now". Almost forgot, he added 2 quartcans of VEEDOL_AL1 anti-freeze. A tallguy walks in and intro's himself as Bob Richards, Manager of the shop & says I should have a good oldgoaly toychaser of a trip.

I was going to Worsham the truck, but seems that every year I do, there's a thunder & lightning HolyTara gully washer storm before I get to IG. But as I pass by Young's Union I notice a sign offering FREE Car/Truck washing. I made a quick u-turn & received a Free Wash. Normally they charge $50.

Wife asked what I would like for dinner before I head for bed. Let's make it easy, store bought BBQchicken & Radigan salad, sounds good to me. Then maybe have a little bowl of bonjimmi for desert. & top that off with a bit of hotcidr, before getting a good nights rest.

Laying there trying to go to sleep, I'm thinking After a good nights rest, I'll have 7 days on the road heading in the general direction of IG.

Getting up Early in the wee hours of the morning, I feel like the REDROOSTER, yet my eyes are still kinda BAUGIE.
I threw the mapper book in, might need it to find a few gasoildudes that live out in the sticks. Can't forget the Folgers, Iowa is Maxwell country.

OH DAMN, I'm 3 hours into my trip & forgot to grab the 3 cases of Oranges, I had promised some to Don Beaver & some for jeff anderson also some for Parking Lot Bowling!

After stopping at numerous Antique Stores, most were telling me I should checkout SHIPERS Antique Mall that has a lot of CANS & STUFF near HOPTOWN.

As I'm driving around looking for the mall I noticed a Theroman on the very old EUGENE Bank building. Building was covered in IVY, except were it's WHITEFLASHing the temp. of 112 deg.
I knew it was hot as very few people were walking around. I had been using a TOWLE to DRYE the sweat off my face as the AC had quit working shortly after leaving home.

Found the mall & went in. PETRO NUT heaven. There were signs, globes, pumps & cans everywhere. 1st cans I see are HANCOCK OIL, QUINCY OIL, OHIO OIL, SIGNAL GAS & OIL, GILMORE, PUREGAS just to name a few. There was even a couple of OLDENGINEs in one booth, a HOLT [R.I.P.] & a FLANNERY & what I thought was a pile of rusty iron. Note that was tied to a piece said it was an OSBECK. I'm still scratching my head trying to figure it out ! Also saw a brass etching of the HUNTLEY.
Lots of nice stuff, but left empty handed, guess the recession hadn't hit them.

Guy at the door thanked me for stopping. I asked MAC [name tag ID] where he recommends eating in town ? Says I ain't got a choice, STINNETT's is it. After supper I found a mom & pop Motel & get checked in.

Next morning I'm Still not sure of the route, but off I go. I spot a highway sign ahead SANBO72 miles, never been there, I got time. As I get near I'm hearing a GRINDER noise so I pulled in to Bustermonty's Garage, he puts it up on the russj lift out back.

Says it's OLD IRON & not GMSTUFF but thinks he can repair it, he tells HUSKYBOB to fetch 396L35 part off the shelf. But his eye sight is failing & he grabs KZ1000 instead, so after finding the right part & adding some ALEX cause it was a QTLOW, 3 hours later I'm back on the road. Never wanting to return.

As I pull into PETROPUMPS truck harbor for the umpteenth time this trip for some GASANDGO & wishing I had Jack R along to help pay for fuel.

I'm thinking about the effects of this mornings breakfast. Not sure what it was but ordered the WAGZ & SODAMAMAK special! I spotted the restroom sign on side of building. I'm doing a 2 step getting there.

Just in time ! I hear the door slam shut behind me. To say I was a BLASTMASTER is saying it politely ! They'll have to call JKYOCOM [he's a plumber].\ & if can't unclogg the drain they'll have to call The HoneyBearFarms service truck!

Back on the road after the FlatLand's, I'm heading up a long grade on a secondary road in Wyo., I'm stuck behind a BIG BLAZER stuck in LOWRIGHT pulling a 42Packard, bet he's glad he found a Classicfix. So after awhile I can see a place to pass, but it's a double yellow. I check my mirrors & go for it.
Wrong.
Just as I cross back in I see a COOPWYO's finest PUBLICENEMY1925 ... RACECOP hiding near the top. Oh Gawd, ain't gonna be any SAVINSAM my butt, this is gonna cost a lot of GREEN DINO !
Why is it Every time I fill w/ HI OCTANE, something like this happens ?

Pulls me over & Sgt. bigferg [RIP] asked where I'm heading in such a hurry. I says Iowa Gas as he's looking in pickup bed & see's the GAS STUFF. He asked if I know oltoydoc, says that's his cousin. YEH, I know Don. Pats me on the shoulder, shakes his head & says he Doesn't understand the addiction of getting to IG before the show starts. Says Don will drive to Wyo. under the pretense of seeing the folks, then spends all his time looking for gas stuff!

Before escorting me out of state, he suggested I get some more TBUCKLES crisscrossed over my load, as it gets real windy in Neb.

Spent the night in WHITE STAR, Neb. Watching the news, they were talking about a large CANOSAURUS that was discovered in South Dakota & Professor Scobie was in charge of the dig w/ Dr. Greg overseeing. It was reported also the dig was being funded by Wes Hague of Canada.

When I arrived at the Dead Road highway exit, I was haled & informed by Mr. Wes Hague's driver, KEITHIA I would not be allowed to view the site up close. I tried to explain that I am an ADVERTOLOGIST reporter for ROBBINS TV network & not just a LURKER.
It worked !
So I SWABBY back over to the truck to get the camera & a pad to write on. This skinny little POLLYMAN walks over wanting to carry my camera gear, said he'd been trying for a couple hours to get past the barricades.

Just as we get to the dig area there are these 2 large security cops GEORGE SAGER & ED STEAGALL stops us & said the dig was over for the day & we'd have to leave. GAWD, I hate when that happens. Drive all day & get there at closing.

Oh well, back on the road & a few hours later I'm getting close to WFORT. Looking ahead I see what looks like 2 Indians in the road. As I pull over to go around slowly, 1 walks over in front of me, I stop & ask what's going on. He says me LILGASMAN32, [him pointing to other one is] SKYMOBIL we make Rain. Hey, I ain't seen a cloud all day, how do you think you can make rain ? We dance, it rains, you see.

15 minutes down the road it starts to rain! It's looking like a river instead of a highway & now it looks like I'll need a HOTBOAT to get to next town.

Gotta find a Motel w/ AC, this humidity makes it hard getting a good nites sleep in the cab + I need a plug in for my ESHAVER, ain't done that since I left home.

I stop at 1st motel that doesn't have a No Vacancy sign lit & get checked in. It's Friday Night & I'm sitting outside trying to unwind & having a cold one watching all the locals are out in their cars. small town cruise night. Plenty of hotrods along w/ a RAG NOVA, 1 BAD ZR1, 57 Tbirdkid, Hotrodhudson48, even JUNKER JONES was out in his vintage Towbiz truck. He has to be a GARAGE JUNKIE just to keep it road worthy. Fallowing was a Hotroddeuce, guy must be a KUSTOMPAINTER you could surely see that he likeitall. There was a Rusty gasgeezer pulling Tomstoybox w/ a large sign for Woodys Rod Shop. Can't forget the Foreign looking guy driving a Fast66[he was kinda Squirrely]. Lots of old Rust and Dust relics that have been saved from the scalptrader!

I gotta get some sleep. While laying here waiting for the Sandman325, all I can think of is Pumps&signs, Gas Stuff & how I can Recycle68 some of this stuff @ Iowa Gas. I know there will be some Petroholic's from all over, Carolinaskies, ctsignguy, tennesseepickers, Utahsignguy, WesternNebrOillCo & some of the new guys from oldgas. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Next day after I fire up the rustynuts Dodge & head out on the LostHighway as I'm headed out on another long straight stretch of road & alwayslookin, I pull out the Maps for the memories & glance over some of the different routes I've taken. Up ahead I spot a large Tourist Trap sign, CHIEFMIKE, painted up like a warriorgas. On the next billboard is Petro Petel sporting a azjockey hat & promoting the New TBirdgas pumping it into a Martin from OZ.

I pulled in for MO-GAS at the 1st petropumps I see. I'm @ Nucky's KYGulf, a good gulf guy walks out to take my money. Name tag says GULFGLENY & says if ya got 10 Nicole's more he'd fetch me a sody-pop while I'm fill'n the tank.

I Had made plans to split a room with philmccauley, but heard he was caught paying for Regular & pumpingethyl & now is pasngas as a ironranger behind bars so he won't be at Iowa Gas.
Hope oslosteve has room for a roll-away amongst his tjhvintage Cases of coke_and_stuff [Southern Comfort] he always stores in his room. Just hope he doesn't party A L L night in the room.

Sure hope Jack Sim's Didn't forget to bring the Deep fat fryer, heard it was the ONLY way to cook texaspelican! Might have to have a few steiners of BlueFox Beer & ColdPizza [YUK] or 1/2 Doz. of those Burtuckyboy Burgers to kill the taste! After the Beer is gone, I hope I can Stover to the hotel to sleep it off !

Was thinking of having minuteman hash browns & eggs for Thursday morning breakfast with KW Frith in his Motor Home. BUT, Jarvis IS in charge of eggs. 'nuff said! Hope Tway doesn't bring any Lucky Dog donuts, AGAIN, they'll give ya Badgas.

All of a sudden I'm being shook violently. WAKE UP, WAKE UP Dick, your having a bad dream.
As I come around I can only think Earthquake, FIRE !!
WHATS going on ?

Wife said I was having a BAD Dream !

ROTFLMAO!!!

And yes. RIP, Chris Holt...

Thanks Dick for taking us back.. Great Blast from the past, old names I miss too.
Ric
Ducecpe

Amazing!

Never get tired of seeing this Dick. Thanks for the Mamories

1st short version posted in 2006. They have been added to, edited, added some more, combined & edited again. There was a Detour in One that might have been lost in 2009 Switch Over.

Very entertaining! It is;however, a little worrisome that you actually have this much free time on your hands. Hahaha!

Love it every year DB...

alot of thought went into that , way to go db!!!

Ya do have a way with words! Good job!

Great job Dick!

Makes me think about what your trips to Iowa are really like! LOL Love it! Keep it up Dick…..

Very entertaining, as usual. You have a unique way of writing. Every year seems to get longer and better, using more "member names" each year. Keep it up, Dick! ! !
Thanks

Kudos, big guy....

Enjoyed the read, thanks for the hard work DB.